(radio playing, car hum tires blast of wind)
flash from space! ... Mission Control reports that th
experiment attached to th toilet has exploded, causing flooding in th shuttlecraft ... an
now back to th music!
(play it upbeat like th beginning of Summertime Blues over an over)
I'm a dead man
I'm a dead man
I'm lyin' in th ground
I don't make a sound
no sound
no sound
in th ground
in th ground
I'm a dead man
I'm a dead man
I'm not hangin' from th trees
I'm not gettin' off my knees
no knees
no knees
no trees
no trees
I'm a dead man
I'm a dead man
I've got my very own grave
My rent's already paid
own grave
own grave
already paid
already paid
I'm a dead man
I'm a dead man
Never tell th truth no more
Ain't gonna cause no trouble
(sound like a chicken laying an egg)
I'll forever be a good boy!
I'll forever be a good boy!
I'm a dead man
hey! hey! hey!
that's TH MEATSEEKERS singing I'M A DEAD MAN from thr new hit album MORE MUSIC LESS WHITE
POWDER ... 12:48 am Road Warriors ... coming soon, pop-up houses, flashing lights,
hormones an a prominent veterinarian talks about people who smell like thr pets ... but
first! ...
All my family beams w/ pride!
Cuz r butts r tougher than Naugahyde!
I've gotta baboon's butt
Don't need no Naugahyde
I can sit right on th floor.
I've gotta baboon's butt
Don't need no Naugahyde
Cuz my butt is never sore.
I don't need no Naugahyde
I don't need no plastic ride
I don't need no Persian rug
I don't need no comfy hug
I jus needa plain dirt floor
Cuz my butt is NEVER sore.
Jus give Dr. Chimp a try
An yr butt'll be tougher than Naugahyde.
Baboon butts come in th brightest post-modern colors.
Monkey knuckles
Hands on feet
Lowered brow
Dr. Chimp - Simian Similarities
WHILE U WAIT!
WOW! Great! I'm
having my brow lowered next week! An now, mooorre mus ................
(click!)
Wut a journey! ... this trip ... this trip has been ... this trip has been hell
from th start ... we leave late, sky hanging like a teardrop in pearly heat ... a dust
devil winds its way up a dry riverbed, path of least resistance ... gathering power it
picks itself up by its dirtstraps, deflects off a bridge an settles on a Waffle House ...
bright yellow sign swaying, windows in th tiny box establishment concave inward ... a
vacuum deepens ... patrons munch waffles and stare as th sign rocks in wafture, torn paper
bags swirl round an round ...
We leave late ... we did ... but we leave, yes, hugging th border so close we can smell
death ... a hot wind from th South ... brown dust, th smell of death ... yes, delayed ...
delayed once again ... waiting a few hours while a town moves North ... a whole damn town!
even a tired ol' gas station ... sheds, picket fences, flatbeds piled w/ possessions ...
ivy clings to tacky metal frames ... soon a river valley, camps, a city that smoked ...
that, that rocket attack at th pass ... we rn't on any transport schedule, nothing
military coming through ... kids asleep in th back ... snoring softly ... my hands loose
at th wheel ... road hums, great black night empty an vast, moon waned, eaten, about to
set ... radio some religious stuff ... man, woman trading passages, flat western voices
proclaiming doom ...
and they shall fall down
they shall prostrate themselves with fear
and pray to the rocks and mountains
WHAM! WHAM! WHAM!
caught thr engines w/ jus a half-sec to spare. Bastards! only Fascists wld
attack civilian travelers ... sent a MEATSEEKER™ up thr asses ... take a few days an
figure yrselves outta that one! HA!
then ... 100 mph through a moonless still of darkness ... Scorpio curled over
our shoulders ... it gets weird .. at a rest stop ... orange lights a glow over concrete
picnic tables .... Sperm Smugglers begging freon, way they hiss when they talk, those
yellow eyes ... later ... scratch country ... iron land, hollow and breathless ... bushes
like an itch, irritated an sore ... there, over yonder ... scattered, bunched like so much
armadillo meat ... these ... little ... people? they r wearing clothes ... th buzzards ...
well
that's it ... a town ... a roadhouse ... definitely time to
stop.
